The Line Between Heart and Break
by pennanomino
Summary: Inspired by the can-opener scene, but not about the can opener. Donna and Harvey go out to enjoy dinner after Harvey apologizes post- Cameron Dennis. Written from Donna's perspective as she crosses the line she drew between her and her boss twelve years ago. She thought that line was set in stone. Cheesecake, sarcasm, scotch, and a wink change her mind.
1. Chapter 1

**Note: This is loosely based on the events surrounding the can-opener scene from Dogfight, but I didn't follow the plot exactly. I have no idea what they did with the can opener, so I skipped over that part and added my own variation. Also I do not own Suits or any of its characters. **

She knew.

Donna had her back to the hallway, but she knew before he was within ten yards that Harvey was coming to her desk.

The abrupt stop to several conversations was unmistakable. It could have been Jessica, but the hush would have been quicker to fall. Harvey intimidated, but nobody did scary like Jessica. Plus the person walking was clearly not wearing heels.

Technically Harvey could have been heading to his office, but his walk was more purposeful than it had been in days. That meant he'd either decided to forgive her, or fire her. Donna wouldn't admit it under threat of death, but the tingle in her back was her telltale sign of anxiety. She loved this job more than anything. The cases, the clients, the research, Mike, Harvey…

She shut down that last thought. On principle she avoided putting the words "love" and "Harvey" in the same sentence, and by now her disciplined mind was used to shoving aside inconvenient truths. She found certain things were easier to deal with if you just never let them see the light of day.

Harvey was behind her now; she resisted the urge to turn. If she did and he was going to fire her, then she would be able to see it on his face and she wanted to delay the news as long as possible. Even if he wasn't going to fire her, turning around would mean they would be face to face, inches apart, and she had a feeling that would lead to an awkward situation. Especially since it was the middle of the day in the office with lots of people around.

Again Donna had to derail a train of thought before things really got away. Harvey took a seat behind her, and she heard him take a breath to speak. The rest of the office faded out and her entire world focused in.

"I'm sorry." The words were slow and gruff, but genuine.

Donna's poker face neared perfection, but even she could not prevent a wide smile from gracing her features. Forcing her expression back into seriousness- though she knew the effort was weak- Donna could not resist poking him just a little.

"For what?"

"Don't push it."

Donna grinned again, not bothering to maintain her mock solemnity.

"I think we should celebrate." A sudden desire to spend time with him was strong, and today was not a day to resist temptation.

"Matteo's?" She knew from his tone that he'd raised an eyebrow at her unusual request; usually it was he who asked her to dinner.

"I'll make the reservations. Normal time."

"I'll pick you up."

"_Ray _will pick me up. You'll just be in the car."

"Do you have to be so detail-oriented?"

"Do you want a good secretary?"

He rose out of his chair.

"You're not a good secretary. You're great." He passed by her, lightly touching her shoulder as he left to decimate some poor man in court. Donna picked up the phone and thought about dress colors, her right shoulder tingling ever so slightly.

By 6:55 Donna was ready. For her average date that meant a shower, blow dried hair, a nice dress and make up. For Harvey that meant a shower, styled hair with extra spray, painted nails that went perfectly with her dress and shoes, flawless make-up, carefully selected jewelry, and a specific brand of perfume that Harvey had complimented once at a firm party.

The comparison was quite pathetic really. Donna didn't let herself dwell on any of this as she sped around her apartment, checking to make sure she was entirely prepared. Naturally, she was.

When Harvey buzzed her at 7, she was already at the door. He arrived perfectly on time every occasion he picked her up. Punctuality was a precise science to him. She grinned, thinking of Mike's most recent late arrival to work. She swore that boy was setting records for arriving late, but still getting all his work in by the time it was absolutely necessary. Mike made a precise science out of tardiness.

When she arrived on the street, Harvey courteously held the door open for her. He bowed jokingly after she was settled and walked around to his side while she laughed.

"What were you smiling about when you walked out?" He asked.

"Oh, just appreciating Mike's ability to be late."

Throwing one hand dramatically over his eyes, he groaned in reaction to her reply.

"I'm glad you find that cause for amusement. I'm fairly certain that kid has been late more time in his first year than I have in my entire career. He's lucky he has such an easygoing boss."

"Easygoing?" Donna demanded. "_That's _the word you use to describe yourself?"

"Why?" He peeked out at her from behind the hand that was still splayed across his face, "How would you describe me?"

Donna considered this minefield of a question. She had to bite back on the instinctive responses of her brain: _Handsome, charming, sexy…_

Harvey watched her while she contemplated potential responses, finally settling on the one she knew would truly horrify him.

"Caring." He made an indignant noise and sat up abruptly, the hand falling off his face to reveal an outraged expression.

"Caring? Objection, you have no evidence to support this claim!"

She grinned, quite pleased with his reaction.

"Well, let's see. Despite all your moaning and grousing about Mike's tardiness, you still haven't fired him, or demoted him to being a Louis lackey, or even officially reprimanded him. And that's after you hired him even though he has never been to law school."

He opened his mouth to protest but her flinger flicked up to cut him off.

"You have also gone to great lengths to protect him from Louis and other associates."

"I wouldn't call those _great _lengths." He grumbled unconvincingly.

Donna threw him a look. "I happen to know that you used one of your most serious threats on Louis to get him to back off."

Harvey looked at her with something like exasperation, "Have you bugged all of Pearson and Hardman?"

She raised an eyebrow mysteriously, but Ray's voice prevented her from replying.

"We are here."

They blinked, their repartee having distracted them from the drive. Harvey recovered first and came around to open Donna's door. She gracefully accepted the proffered hand, and the pair swept inside.

An efficient waitress led them through the array of expensive furniture to a secluded table. Harvey leaned around to help Donna with her entrée selection, and it took a pathetic amount of effort to control her breathing when he brushed against her shoulder. The conversation proceeded amiably as the two compared notes on the various scandals of Pearson Hardman and critiqued their coworkers. The casualties of their biting sarcasm included Louis (naturally), Mike (also a given), 6 different associates (really, they were sitting ducks), a couple of secretaries (some unprofessional relationships in that group) and the eldest Senior Partner (who had a tendency to fall asleep at meetings).

Looking back Donna noted that she could count on one hand the people who had never suffered from their caustic reproach.

"Three fingers, really" was Harvey's unabashed reply. "Me, you, and Jessica."

Donna nodded in agreement, mock serious. "Such high standards we have Harvey. Shall we condemn everyone below our level?"

"Yes," he confirmed, solid in his conviction. "How else will they learn?"

She managed to hold on to her poker face, and conceded this point. "It is a burden, really, that we are superior. I wonder if it would sometimes be easier to live in ignorance."

The light in Harvey's eyes dimmed, and his serious tone lost its teasing edge. "I have found that no matter how hard you try to keep the truth in a box, it will always find a way to slip through the cracks."

No smile tucked into the corner of her lips now, Donna valiantly tried to maintain her playful tone. "Doomed to cognizance then? Forever above those simpletons around us?"

He seemed to awaken from his former solemnity and grinned at his beautiful secretary.

"A horrible fate, I'm sure."

They left two hours later, the savory meal settling comfortably in their stomachs.

"I still can't believe you talked me into ordering a chocolate dessert. I'm going to have to run two extra miles to burn that off." Donna said to Harvey with a mock glare.

"Convinced _you_? Yea, I really had to twist your arm to get you to order that piece of cheesecake. You'd been eyeing the dessert menu all night." He retorted.

Donna grinned, knowing it was true. "Maybe, but I would've never ordered it if you hadn't suggested that we try something sweet."

He was still smiling, but he spoke softly now, "You deserve a little chocolate now and again. Besides, I really don't think you should be concerned with staying in shape. You look pretty good to me." He ended with a wink that was sexy in all the right ways. Donna had to remember to close her mouth as Harvey continued down the steps.

_Did he really just say that?_

Standing on the gilded steps in front of an expensive restaurant, Donna eyed the invisible line that had existed between her and her boss for twelve years. Harvey may have gone right up to the edge a few times, but he would never cross it, per her request. If anything were to happen, Donna would have to "make the first move" so to speak.

_Ugh, so high school._ But that was how it was. So when Donna stepped back into the car, she threw a glance at the handsome man who got in beside her. Did she really want to start something up between them?

_O.K., stupid question. _Of course she did. He was handsome, smart, successful, charming, and unlawfully sexy. The real question was,

_Am I willing to risk it? _

Donna was hyper aware of the fact that it could all come crashing down around them. If it ended badly, their friendship would go up in flames. Her stomach clenched at the thought of having to find a new job, maybe in a whole new city, away from him.

But then she remembered the smiles and winks that seemed to be for her, only for her. She remembered the Harvey she'd seen that he never showed to anyone else.

As the car slowed to a stop, the words came out almost before she decided to say them.

"I have a really nice bottle of single malt upstairs." She let the sentence hang for a moment as Harvey turned to a look at her, something akin to hope in his eyes.

"Fancy a drink?"

**Ok, I originally intended this as a one shot, but it got too long. So the next and final chapter should be up soon, maybe a week or so. Any ideas about what you would like to see happen in Donna's apartment, please let me know. Any other criticisms, comments, or praise (especially praise) are more than welcome.**

**Thanks!**


	2. Chapter 2

_I really didn't think this through._

Donna unfortunately only realized this as she turned the key in her apartment's lock. Nonetheless, she led Harvey across the threshold, blessing the poker face that hid her consternation. While her boss- her _boss_- stood looking curiously around him, Donna was thinking she had no idea what she was going to do next.

She had spent the entire car ride deliberating over whether or not to invite Harvey up to her apartment. She never considered what to do when he got there.

Technically she had been through this situation many times in her head. But those were pure imagination. And heavily influenced by wine, sleep deprivation, and Lifetime movies. Plus, fantasy Harvey always made the first move. Faced with reality, she knew the ball was definitely in her half of the court.

In an increasingly desperate search for inspiration, Donna copied Harvey's actions and glanced around her apartment. The bottle of scotch came to her rescue. She led Harvey to the couch and poured out the promised glasses. The tumblerwas cold on her lips when Harvey spoke.

"Hold on!"

"What?" Donna threw a glance his way. She really, _really _needed that drink.

"We need to toast." Like it was the most obvious thing in the world.

"Fine." Donna looked at him expectantly. His idea. His toast.

Harvey stared into his glass for a moment. He turned to look at Donna with an odd look in his eyes to match an equally odd toast.

"Life is short. Don't dwell on the bad and don't waste the good.

Donna let his words settle for a moment. And then Harvey broke the silence again.

"My mother used to love the poem "Life" by Charlotte Bronte. That was how she paraphrased one of the verses."

"Rapidly, merrily,

Life's sunny hours flit by,

Gratefully, cheerily

Enjoy them as they fly"

(Charlotte Bronte, "Life")

Harvey stared at her, unabashed shock in her eyes. Donna was a little surprised with herself. She had recited that verse almost unconsciously, like a reflex.

"One of my high school English teachers had it above her door. I saw it everyday for nearly a year. It-" She paused. "It helped me through a few things."

She saw the question in his eyes, but he didn't press.

_Thank God for that._

Now was really not the time to be explaining those "few things".

Donna envisioned the black letters, gracefully scripted on a simple white sign. The words were staring her in the face, a poetic reminder of why she had invited Harvey up here in the first place.

Silence followed her explanation and Donna knew she should start talking. But she felt a bit like a skydiver facing the 15 thousand foot drop. Yeah, she had decided to do this, but at the same time her brain was coming up with everything that could possibly go wrong.

Her mind was presenting its six hundredth worst-case scenario when Harvey's voice broke into her reverie.

"Donna? Are you okay?"

Harvey was speaking in what Donna called his "mother-hen" voice. It was a tone he only used when he was genuinely concerned and only with the select few he trusted with the knowledge that he had a beating heart.

Donna's mouth was literally forming the classic "I'm fine" response, when she paused. Even when she was miserable, the polar opposite of "fine", she had only ever answered that question one way.

But, hell, if she was going to be honest with Harvey, might as well start here.

"No. I'm not." Her answer shook him a little, that much was obvious. But this was Harvey Specter and the moment of surprise was brief. He leaned in a little closer- _really _not helping her thought process- and asked the obvious follow up question.

"What's wrong?"

She looked him full in the face- damn, he had pretty eyes- and sighed. She had got him all the way up her, poured him a glass of scotch, and spent a solid five minutes panicking over what to say. After all that she might as well just go for it.

"I lied to Mike the other night." She said abruptly. Harvey looked at her, smiling a little.

"Feeling guilty? Don't worry about it, I lie to Mike all the time. It's good for our image."

"This was different. It was about Rachel."

"Oh." Harvey blew out a breath and fell back into the cushions. "Poor kid, but he really didn't have a choice. It wasn't worth the risk."

"Maybe."

"Maybe?" Harvey frowned. "Donna you've said it yourself. Office romances are doomed from the start. Mike can't take that risk."

"What if they were _it_, though? What if it was worth it, in the end?" She stopped herself, but Harvey was already upright and staring.

"Did you watch a Lifetime marathon last night or something? Have romance movies corrupted your mind?"

"I just-" She hesitated, frustrated with herself and this whole mess. "I told Mike that he could do it. That the feelings would go away, eventually." The words were falling in a downpour now.

"The first part was true. He would be able to stay away. But the second part, the "eventually", that is total bullshit."

_Here goes nothing._

"12 years ago, I met you and the first thing I had to do was keep myself from inviting you to drinks. Then 2 years later you asked me out." His jaw tautened and she knew he was remembering.

"Harvey, I didn't say no because I wanted to be professional and I thought office romances were doomed. I didn't even say no because I didn't want to date you. As ridiculously cliché and commitment phobic as this is going to sound, I liked you too much to go out with you. You were pretty much everything I wanted in a guy."

She ran a hand back through her hair, snarling the carefully prepared strands, as she remembered every time she had bit her tongue, ground her teeth, choking back the words that would reveal too much.

"And for a freaking decade I held a lid on it. I kept myself to friendly flirting and mentally cursing every stupid bimbo you had a one-night stand with. But it's been 10 years and I still get that little jolt every time I see you like some kind of lovesick teenager. It's been 10 years and you are still everything I want in a guy. And I've been stuck wondering that if it can last for that long who says it can't last a lot longer?"

Donna could not believe she had done that. She was staring at the wall, still not believing she had done that, when Harvey broke in.

"Is that a yes?" She stared at him, uncomprehending. She could practically feel neurons fizzling as they failed to keep up with the chain of events.

He clarified.

"It's 10 years late, but it's you so I'll take what I can get. Is that a yes to my offer for a date?"

Again Donna's mouth was a few steps ahead of her brain. Only this time words weren't on the agenda.

It instantly won the prize of best first kiss ever.

Later Donna would think that it was hot- _really _hot- but not rushed. Like there was nowhere else in the world Harvey would rather be.

In the moment her brain was not functioning. She wasn't even sure she was breathing. She pushed against him and he sank back onto the couch, tugging her down with him. Donna was literally lying on top of him when she pulled back. Harvey's perfectly brown eyes stared up at her from inches away.

She leaned her forehead against his, trying not to melt in the warmth that radiated from his body.

"Yes. Definitely a yes."

* * *

**Hi, I am so so sorry this is late. I couldn't for the life of me figure out what I wanted to say here, but I think I am reasonably happy with this. A couple of bits are missing but I didn't want to overdo anything. So what did you think?**

**Also if anyone would like me to write a specific Donna/Harvey story I'm up for ideas.**

**Thanks so much for reading and extra thanks to anyone who took the time to review!**


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